I Became the Drug-Addicted Childhood Friend

Chapter 61

A flashlight.
No.

Crackling wires.
No.

A lighter.
No.

Stars.
Yes.
Looking up at the sky, those must be stars.

I'm sitting on top of an abandoned building, gazing at the stars.

To be honest, the idea that I enjoy stargazing is a misunderstanding.
The truth is, I just didn’t have anything else to do.
There’s nothing easier than looking up at the sky.

They say when people die, they become stars.
But that only applies to famous people, doesn’t it?
If I became a star, then maybe Shihu, far away, would know where I am.

I point to the sky with my hand.
Starlight trickles down from my fingertips.
Not because of gravity, but because, in truth, the stars just want to be free.

From the stars floating in the middle of the sky to the ones barely clinging to the horizon, flickering faintly.

[10%]

“I see numbers.”

“What?”

Shihu looks at me like I’m acting strange.
And he’s right.
Even someone with no sense can tell there’s something off about me.

“I used to see time in front of me. It was like a timer—a sort of status screen, but more of a countdown clock.”

He doesn’t seem to understand.
Even stating the facts makes me sound insane.
I get it.

[10%]

“But now, I see this strange percentage instead. It means I’m in debt…”

I don’t seem to have a talent for explaining things.
Shihu still looks confused.
He seems troubled, probably unsure how to respond.

“I’ve always seen it. In a way, it’s like my one and only friend. It’s been with me for as long as I can remember.”

No matter how I say it, it sounds strange.
That makes me sound like a genuinely messed-up person.
Or maybe I’m really just mentally ill.

Wait, is that it?
The world’s gone mad, and I’ve just been ignoring it.
Seeing numbers like this can’t be normal.
Is this some overdue self-awareness?

“Probably since I started using drugs.”

“…I see.”

Shihu tilts his head back to look at the stars.
The starlight shines faintly but unceasingly.
He stretches his hand toward the sky, then lowers it.
Something glimmers faintly at his fingertips.

“Hey, you know what?”

I recall something I read in a book.

“What?”

“I read somewhere that starlight takes hundreds, even thousands of years to reach us. So, the stars we see might already be gone.”

“Yeah, I think I read that too.”

“So, what I’m saying is…”

“Mm?”

Shihu turns to look at me.

“I wanted to be a star too.”

“What?”

“I mean… even after I’m gone, someone could still see me.”

That would be nice.
I just want someone to remember me.

“…You’re not going anywhere,” Shihu says.

“But now that I think about it, I don’t think it’s necessary to be remembered. I’d be satisfied just living a normal life.”

[9%]

Although, living normally doesn’t seem possible.

“By the way, Shihu, how have you been? All this time?”

“Me? Hmm… not good.”

“Why?”

“Because I couldn’t see you… Oh. About what happened back then, I’m sorry.”

“Hm? Oh… it’s fine.”

The memory of our last parting isn’t a good one.
I think Shihu suddenly attacked me.
Did he curse at me? I can’t recall.

“What happened back then wasn’t intentional. I’m sorry. It was because of the skill’s side effects. I should’ve apologized sooner.”

“It’s okay. I don’t even really remember what happened.”

“I’m sorry.”

Was it really something worth apologizing for?
Maybe?
Let’s think about what Shihu said.
Ah, now I remember.

“Oh, yeah. You asked if I’d sold my body, right?”

“Oh, no, that— I’m so sorry.”

He must’ve asked because it was bothering him.

“But, you know, asking something like that…”

It’s… degrading.

“I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to ask something like that, I swear.”

Answer me.
So, did I sell my body?
Am I trash?

“But if I did sell myself, or act like trash… we couldn’t stay friends, right? That’d be a bit much, wouldn’t it?”

Shihu seems lost for words, his breath catching.
Before he can respond, I keep talking.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to answer. Honestly, I don’t even know myself. As far as I can remember, I didn’t do anything like that. But I’m not sure. Sorry.”

I feel his grip tighten on my hand.
He’s uneasy.

“It’s fine. Everything’s fine. Really. No matter what happened, what does it matter? You’re alive. That’s enough.”

I’m glad.

[8%]

No, this isn’t good.
It keeps dropping.

“We’ve seen enough stars for now. Let’s go hunt some monsters.”

That makes the percentage go up.

“What? Monsters?”

“Yeah. Because I’ve got debts to pay. The interest is piling up.”

“I don’t understand.”

Do you still not get it?

“Let go of my hand.”

I was going to go alone anyway.
He doesn’t let go.

“You’re really not letting go?”

“No.”

“Let… go.”

“Where are you going? I’ll come with you.”

There’s no need to hold hands.
No matter where we go.

“Seriously, you’re not letting go?”

“No.”

Why not?
Why won’t he let go?
A logical reason…
I have no idea.
It’d be nice if he told me, but he doesn’t seem like he will.

Something feels wrong.

“My hand hurts.”

“Sorry, I’ll hold it more gently.”

I try twisting my hand free, but I fail.
Shihu is stronger.

[7%]

The number keeps dropping.

“…Hey, are you trying to purify me or something? Is that why you’re holding my hand?”

“What? No, I just—”

“I’ve told you so many times I’m fine. So why? Let go!”

Finally, Shihu releases my hand.

“I’m sorry, I just…”

A distant siren wails.

The sirens grow louder, approaching from the distance.
From up here on the building, I can see them clearly—vehicles that aren’t here for peaceful purposes.
There are several of them, resembling fire trucks, even armored cars.

The sound rings out, rising in pitch as they close in, surrounding the entire area.
Ah, I’ve heard about this before.
When a truly dangerous monster causes serious damage, they deploy forces like this to handle it.
Vehicles carrying "Awakened" individuals to deal with the threat.

They must be coming to hunt something.
A terrifying monster.

Yes, hunting monsters.
Luckily, this area isn’t densely populated.
We can tie the thing down here and wait for reinforcements.
That’s how these things go.

The sirens keep wailing, the lights flashing so brightly they don’t look like stars anymore.
I thought the stars had fallen to the horizon, but it was just the headlights of those vehicles.

Reinforcements, huh?
Do we need them?
Normally, Shihu would handle it, but he’s hurt right now.
So, to make sure it’s dealt with properly…

Who are they here to kill?
Me?
There’s no one else but me.

Ah, this is bad.
All the monsters nearby are dead, so it must be me they’re coming for.

Shihu knew this would happen.
That’s why he held onto my hand, so I couldn’t run away.
Using stargazing as an excuse.

“If you hated me that much, you could’ve just said so. There was no need to act kind and hold my hand.
If I was so disgusting to you, if you wanted me dead so badly because I’m such a monster, you should’ve just told me.
I’d have done it myself. I’d have died quickly.”

Shihu says something, but I can’t hear him.

[6%]

The numbers disappear.
I’m scared.

Black thorns burst outward in all directions.
There’s no sound.
Or maybe there is, but all I hear is a ringing in my ears.

[20%]

Ah, I stabbed him.
I think I stabbed him pretty hard.
The percentage went up a lot.

An attack.
I attacked Shihu.
I think he blocked it, but he looks like it hurt a bit.
Still, thanks to that, I can repay some of my debt.

Clang.

“…Ice?”

My shoes and the ground beneath me are frozen solid.

An "Awakened" did this.
Cheon Yuhwa.
She followed us to this abandoned building and has been watching.
She’s here to kill me.

[23%]

I realize there’s no point holding back when attacking.
They’re all enemies anyway.

I always knew.
It was just wishful thinking.
The hope that someone might want to stay my friend.

If they were really a friend, they’d have come to find me long ago.
Someone, at least one person, would have looked for me.

The black thorns shoot rapidly toward Cheon Yuhwa’s neck.
But before they can reach her, they freeze and shatter.

[26%]

The more pain I inflict, the more debt I can repay.
That’s right.

This time, I create a black wall.
Crash.
It freezes again and shatters.

[30%]

I’ll repay the debt.
I just have to repay it all.

Crack.

An ice spear comes flying, but I block it.
Cheon Yuhwa mutters something, but I can’t hear her.
Her face is filled with hatred.

What did I do to make her so angry?
I don’t understand.
She’s the one trying to kill me.

[33%]

I’ll repay the debt.
This is a great opportunity.
If I repay everything, I’ll be normal again.
If I reach 100%, I’ll be normal.

Then I can go home.
Shihu doesn’t like me because I’m a monster.
If I become normal again, he’ll like me.

Then he won’t try to kill me anymore.
We’ll go back to being friends.
I’ll go home with him.

“Hehe.”

I’m excited.
Cheon Yuhwa yells something, but I can’t hear it.
She points toward Shihu.

Shihu.
He’s lying on the ground.
What’s this?

Someone attacked him.
What kind of terrible person would do that?
The world is so scary.

But it’s okay!

“That’s nothing a dose won’t fix.”

Exactly.

“In just an hour or two, the wounds will heal completely! Don’t worry about Shihu.”

Someone should give Shihu some medicine.
Cheon Yuhwa stares blankly at me.

“I know because I’ve tried it before. Even if you slice someone slowly with a saw, they heal. And you know what? Now that I think about it, medicine is really amazing…”

Even someone as useless as me can fight a strong "Awakened" like Cheon Yuhwa thanks to it.
Truly, medicine is great.
If someone like Shihu or Cheon Yuhwa used it, wouldn’t they become even stronger?
Why didn’t anyone do that sooner?

“Medicine is good…”

Wait, what was I doing again?
Right, looking at the stars.
The stars are beautiful.

“I need my dose…”

Who was I looking at the stars with?
Shihu.
Where is Shihu?

“My dose…”

There he is.
But he’s lying down.
Who attacked him?

…
It was you, you piece of trash.
Have you forgotten what you did?
That’s why Shihu called for reinforcements to kill me.

It’s not my fault.
I’m not normal, so it’s okay for me to do anything.

I’m not human—more like a kind of fish.
But thinking about it, canned tuna tastes good.
Actually, everything tastes good.
If tuna isn’t frozen immediately after being caught, its meat cooks itself from its own heat.
So is that why my legs are still frozen?

They won’t move.
They won’t move at all.

Frozen tuna…
Come to think of it, I’ve never eaten fresh tuna sashimi.
Because, as I said, tuna cooks itself if left alone.
So there’s no need to prepare it. Isn’t that great?

That’s why we need ice.
I’m frozen.

“Haha… haha…”

The stars are so bright it makes my head spin.

Huh?
What?

Those aren’t stars.
They’re the lights of a surgery room.

Or maybe someone wants sashimi and is about to cut me up.
But I’m just a person who likes canned tuna.
Sashimi is a little scary.

“I’m sorry. I’m not in my right mind. I’m a bit out of it, but you understand, right? Thank you. So please, just this once, let Seo Ah go. She’s kind, and good, and innocent. Please, just this one time.”