I Became the Drug-Addicted Childhood Friend

Chapter 58

Shihu approaches.
I’m not a monster.
I begged for forgiveness, so why is he coming closer?
I need to run.

I still haven’t received proper treatment.
My condition is unstable, and I don’t want to see Shihu right now.
But I did tell the Saintess to come, but I never asked Shihu to.
Is that really Shihu?
He looks badly injured.

“Seo Ah?”

Seo Ah?
If you pull off all the petals of a flower, is it still a flower?
When you tear away each layer of identity—self, personality, humanity, and reason—what remains is something barely human.

“I’m not Seo Ah.”

Seo Ah is cuter, kinder, and purer than I am.

“It’ll be okay, Seo Ah…”

Who is Seo Ah?
I’m not her.
I’m not like that.

“No, I’m… I’m just a tuna can!”

That makes sense.
Nowhere is it written that I am Seo Ah.
But it is written that I’m a tuna can.

“Eh?”

“Ah, hello, I’m the tuna can. Cute name, right? You gave it to me, so now I must take care of it. Right? I’m bringing it to Seo Ah with me…”

“What… are you saying?”

You don’t understand?
That’s fine.
But that’s not important.

“You went to the academy, right? Seo Ah was at home. She was home, wasn’t she?”

She should be at home.

“I don’t know much as a tuna can. But Seo Ah really seemed to want to play with you.”

I talk about what’s been happening.
About what I’ve been through.
It’s been a long time since we’ve seen each other.

“When you didn’t show up, I watched from the window at your house. You weren’t there. But did you know? The curtains in your room waved. It told me to wait. So, I waited. All day long.”

All day.
All night.
But Shihu had no intention of coming.

“You never came to Seo Ah, did you? I mean, of course, why would you? You have other friends. But isn’t it funny? Seo Ah was clearly waiting for you, but I saw you laughing and walking with other people. I saw you talking to that one, laughing with them. But it’s fine. Really, it’s fine. You should do what you want. I’m just sitting here. I’m the type to be okay with that. I get it, you probably don’t like me, no one likes me.”

What are you babbling about?

“But why are you standing still like that? Are you hiding something? Are you trying to calm me down by pretending to reassure me, but then attack? Something’s off. You’re hiding something, aren’t you? Aren’t you? You’re supposed to tell me something, but you’re not. Right? Why aren’t you answering?!”

“…”

Shihu seems like he wants to say something, but hesitates for a moment.
Our eyes meet.
He seems surprised.

“Seo Ah, your eyes…?”

Eyes?
I must have accidentally removed my hand from covering them.
Did he see?
I cover them again.

“Eyes? Oh, it’s nothing. I’m just tired, that’s all. Yeah, I’m tired. I’m definitely not a monster.”

“No one thinks you’re a monster.”

“I’m just a tuna can. Or maybe cabbage or lettuce. Wait—did you come with someone else? Are they hiding?”

A vehicle, partly wrecked, is visible in the distance.
It seems it was attacked by monsters.
Smoke is rising; it just arrived.
Shihu doesn’t know how to drive.

“I… I’m going home. Alone. So stay here. Okay? You go play with your friends!”

I take a step back.

“And you wouldn’t know, but I have friends too. I can hang out with them when I get home… Friends don’t threaten me with knives… Haha…”

There’s a reason I need to go home.
I don’t have anywhere else to go, really.

“I came here just to talk to myself. Others won’t interfere. I’m just dealing with monsters over there, don’t worry.”

He’s coming closer.

“Don’t come.”

Crunch.

He attacks.
Black roots shoot out, aiming to strike Shihu.
The roots of a tree.

“You’re like a rotten root beneath a tree. No one cares about you.”

An odd voice echoes.

“Shut up.”

[5%]

For every transfer of pain, I repay the debt.
I’m thankful to those who help repay my debt.
But the only thing I can give in return is pain.

Scrape.
With a flash of light, the black roots are severed.
The attack fails.

This time, the attack is sharper, thinner.
But it’s blocked just as easily.

“You shouldn’t have existed from the start. Who made you? It must have been a mistake. If mistakes still exist, you are that mistake. The world would be better without you.”

“Please, shut up…”

I wish everyone would just die.

Crunch, crunch, crunch.

Black branches and thorns.

No matter how hard I attack, I can’t surpass Shihu.
Because he’s the protagonist.
Even covered in blood, he effortlessly blocks every one of my strikes.

“Don’t come here. You’re not the only one with friends.”

I’ll have my friends come help me.
They’ll come.

“I… I have a friend who even gives me gifts.”

A gift.
It was a ribbon.
Black.

A ribbon?
Where did it go?
I’m not one to wear ribbons often.

“A gift… a ribbon… a friend’s gift… I had one, but… I lost it. Wait a second, I think I dropped it.”

I look at the ground, but all I can see are stones.

“Try making sense. But honestly, everything you’re saying is trash. It’s meaningless. I don’t even want to listen. Just be quiet. Your voice is polluting the world. Stones are better. They’re quiet.”

What are you saying?
It’s noisy.
The ribbon is right here.

“Ah, here it is. Haha.”

With trembling hands, I pick up the ribbon from the ground.
I could never lose the gift a friend gave me.

Seo Ah, who has stopped attacking, picks something up from the ground.

“Look, it’s a ribbon.”

It’s not a ribbon. It’s wire.
She smiles, holding the discarded wire.

“It’s the gift from a friend. I have friends too.”

The ribbon was from Shihu.
But this is wire.
Seo Ah uses the wire to tie a bit of her hair.

But the wire is too loose to stay.
It falls to the ground with a soft thud.

“…”

Silence.
That can’t be a ribbon.

It’s just wire.

“…Tuna can doesn’t wear ribbons.”

Seo Ah says this and steps on the wire.
Shihu, who had succeeded in reuniting with Seo Ah, is unable to understand anything.

Tuna can?
I don’t understand.
My head hurts.
The situation is strange.

“I’m sorry, Seo Ah.”

I apologize.
I don’t even know what to say.
But I won’t give up on Seo Ah.

“I’m a tuna can, okay? It’s delicious.”

Seo Ah tilts her head, looking confused.

“No, you’re…”

“Don’t come.”

But still, she moves closer.

“It’s not a tuna can. It’s Seo Ah.”

“I told you not to come…”

One more step closer.
Just standing still won’t solve anything.
There’s no other way.

“I’ll save you. I promise.”

Somehow.
Just the fact that Seo Ah is alive is enough to be thankful for.
Let’s be grateful for her life, and find hope.

“Ha, aha, I know who you are.”

Seo Ah, stepping back, speaks.

“You’re a researcher, right? You’re planning to take me again?”

“No.”

“Shut up.”

The fact that she’s angry is new.
This is the first time I’ve seen Seo Ah this angry.

“It’s all your fault. Not me. You’re the monster, not me—”

Thud.

Seo Ah trips on something as she steps back.
She tries to stand but fails.
Her clothes seem caught on something.

She can’t escape.
Seo Ah, with a terrified expression, slowly looks up.

She can’t escape.

“Ahhhh, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I was wrong, I was wrong.”

“No.”

No, don’t apologize.

“It’s my fault that I cursed and attacked. You’re trying to fix it, right? I’m a bad person, I need to be fixed… I’m so sorry.”

“No…”

Shihu, who hears this, feels as though he wants to die.
What happened to Seo Ah?
Who did this to her?
No one answers, no matter how many questions he asks.

“Just tell me what you want… I was wrong, I’ll do anything… Do I need to cut off a finger? Close my eyes? What should I do? Hehe…”

“…”

“Ahhhh, it’s because I moved, right? I won’t do it again… No, I won’t move… I can even stop breathing if that’s the problem… I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

But now, Seo Ah doesn’t get angry at Shihu’s approach.
Shihu moves closer.
He stretches out his hand, close enough to touch her.

Seeing Seo Ah, his childhood friend, show a submissive attitude feels strange.
Being soaked in drugs and not recognizing him is even stranger.
Failing to hold her breath.
Trying to crawl back when he reaches out to help, but getting stuck on her clothes.

There are no words.
It’s clear he’s only causing more harm, not help.
But still, he reaches out again.
A bloodstained hand.
Whether it’s Shihu or Seo Ah, both are covered in wounds.

“Let’s go home.”

It feels like we’ve come too far.
It’s time to go home.